Turning Blue
by Space-Weazel
Summary: Nothing makes your heart ache more than knowing that you could have done something while you idly sat by and stared into oblivion. Is that how we are to be remembered?


The snow came down relentlessly, the wind carrying it as ten million arrows through a field a war, killing all those who dared oppose its view, its command. It was only necessary, of without dominance, who could rule this land, this plain of earth and sky that stretched beyond each generation's eye, proving an indomitable force, inescapable, all-powerful, a god among the lands. She was cruel, so much crueler than the nymphs of the ocean and the whims of the land. She would always be the ice maiden, the fair one, the sinless guilty pleasure for which the land offered itself as sacrifice. She was everything and yet nothing. She was an enigma, one that would last throughout the ages, one that was never to be solved- and all knew, for all told of her. Yet, still her name was a secret, spoken only in whispers by those who had courage enough to do so much.

Her name was Nothingness. Nothingness, conqueror of all, ruler of nothing. She was perfection, the epitome of such. All loved and feared, all knew, all forgot, all fathomed. It was only human.

-

He sighed, shaking his head, turban tilted forward, threatening to cover his eyes in a veil of white cloth. The fire dimmed with each passing gust of wind. It was useless to keep it burning anyway, for all his efforts he could only smile, chuckling softly when the air would let him. With a flick of his wrist the fire quietly glowed brighter than a dying star before returning to its dwindling form. The irony amused him- how things in nature often represented ones life, their entire story replicated so perfectly in meaningless actions that it was the cause for hysterics. Such is life, such is the beautiful pain found in knowing when a good thing was over.

His time waxed and waned as the moon, seeming longer at times, shorter at others. It was a cycle, a vicious cycle that had been going on since time began. It was intended, cruel in its obviousness, but somehow appealing, tempting as a crimson apple, bitter as vinegar, and intoxicating as the finest of chocolate. Again, he shook his head, coughing faintly as he did and reaching out with a slender hand to grasp his cloak around himself before closing his eyes.

They wouldn't mind, he was sure. They would not even bat so much as an eye. They never did, it was apparent that even though his efforts would live through all eternity, his being was to be forgotten, written down as the history books care to portray, and in time, even his name, his sire's name was to be erased, replaced with a false human character, wiped out of existence in this realm. The thought made his flesh ache, literally ache, a dull throb shown in a clenching heart and twisted face whose strings were pulled by Pain, the cruelest of puppetmasters.

Maybe he would become a star. A burning light of a world, one that spread light, faith, but never hope, that double-edged sword that all too often cuts its masters hand. A smile formed on his lips, tugging at the corners as his head rested against the oak behind him, serving as a pillow. Heh, maybe if anyone in the afterworld liked him; he could come back, if only for a few minutes. There were so many things left undone, unsaid. So many people who were going to remember him, remember the bad over the good and the sad over the happy- the few happy moments. Another ache formed in his chest, heart clenching again, a stabbing sensation, yet he remained unchanged.

He could see it with his eyes closed. It was beautiful where he was going in his sleep. So beautiful. . .Like a dusty sunset, reflecting all the colors, or at least all that mattered. . .The most beautiful ones, red, yellow, orange, colors of fire, power, love, hatred. . .The best ones for the best feelings.

-

Her icy breath sailed across the glass, turning it to shard of ice before her very eyes. It was marvelous, even the black roses froze, surrendering their lusting spirit to hers. They would forever he hers, hers alone, and always coated in ice, the soul of her being. One remained in her hair, those dark frigid locks, swaying only with the north gale and always tearing at the wing with fingertips of steel, of concrete, all that man has made as she defied. It was her signature for he rest of her says upon this earth.

Another name, another step, each one bringing the fate of another, some more important than others. It was in her soul that she kept the list; it was part of her, now and forever. In silence it was hers to survey, hers to read, hers to take quill to, hers to check names off of before tide and squall fought her hand. A death smirk ran across her features, cracking her skin, bleeding the sky, leaking crystals from above in a rain of malice.

Now was the winter of her content

-

Soft footsteps muffled the sound of falling snow. Even in the dead of Nothingness it could be heard- yet he did not turn face or move, staying where he was, emerald lips covering soft eyes. He heard it before it even started. The cries came, each one sharper than the last. Each one different, bringing itself into life through the demise of another. It was methodical, rhythmic. . .Perfect. . .Absolute.

"Don't. . ." The voice cooed with the tenderness of a mother, something all too unfamiliar."

No motion, not even the faintest sway of garment in the breeze. It was a choice. His choice. Not one, not even death could take it away from him. Inwardly, he was laughing. Not an angry laugh, but one of sorrow, tender heartache. It hurt. Ached in his heart, again, more powerfully than ever it ached, tearing away at his existence, eating him alive. . .And he chose it.

"Please. . ." The voice spoke again, so loving, it burned, soothed, calmed." "You don't have to have this"

The lies. They were the perfect color in my minds eyes, blue as the ocean, shallow as his pride. It quieted him, the self-realization taking hold, grasping spirit in hand, wrenching it till it bled out the royal color. He gasped, visibly so, neck tilting back a his lips parted in attempt to moan, expel the emotion, cure the pain.

". . .You were my hero"

Hesitating, eyes cracking open, their black color piercing the winter's gaze for a moment before closing, rolling back, white flag replacing their once vivid power. Letting himself retire into the darkness, he fell limp, Grecian body collapsing upon itself with only the motherly set of arms supporting what was far too big for them

-

The prize was warm, writhing between her fingers and she caught it in an iron grip. Her howls could be heard only by the deaf, her grin seen only by the blind, and her heartbeat felt only by her victims. Nothingness was absolutely. The only thing left for one to pass, the only implausibility. Her bag of marbles was home to all her victories. This, like so many before belonged in there, and there it found its home, no more distinguished than the last. It was not to be remembered after all.

-

Last breath ripped from his body, he chocked, head snapping skyward, staring into the nearing oblivion, reading his fate as it was laid upon the skies. His proud eyes overcastted, lips paled at his fortune. When all was to be said, and all was to be done, he was to be no more. Nothingness. He was no more than a phantom among the earth, trembling, quaking, a ghost of a fallen man. It was his destiny, and now, it was facing him with eyes the color of blue ice. Time was up. He was too late; it was done without a breath to spare for a farewell.

The boy whose voice was broken upon racking sobs only stared on past the 'once-was', to the fire, catching it before it to gave in, dying in an instant, embers extinguished in the blink of an eye.

Swallowing hard, he fought for each breath; body shaking before spitting out words that never should have touched those cherry lips.

"No hero of mine would ever give up."

-

I didn't want to know.  
I just didn't want to know.  
Best to keep things in the shallow end  
'cause I never quite learned how to swim.

I just didn't want to know.

Close my eyes just to look at you.  
Taken by the seamless vision.  
I close my eyes.  
Ignore the smoke.  
Ignore the smoke.  
Ignore the smoke.

Call an optimist,she's turning blue.  
Such a lovely color for you.  
Call an optimist,she's turning blue.  
While I just sit and stare at you.

Because I don't want to know.  
I just didn't want to know.

Mistook the nods for an approval.  
Just ignore the smoke and smile.

Call an optimist,she's turning blue.  
Such a lovely color for you.  
Call an optimist,she's turning blue.  
Such a perfect color for your eyes.  
Call an optimist,she's turning blue.  
Such a lovely color for you.  
Call an optimist,she's turning blue.  
While I just sit and stare at you.

I don't want to know.

-

Disclaimer: I do not own Dragonball or related products, or do I own the band Perfect Circle, or their lyrics.


End file.
